Don't you love the over-the-top excitement of little kids when they receive a gift? They can hardly contain their joy. The jumping up and down, the squealing with delight, the ear-to-ear smile.
Then, at some point along life's journey, that beautiful energy of receiving gets squashed when we tell our little one to calm down and to stop the squealing just when they are expressing all that excitement about getting gifts for their birthday or Christmas. WE start to become uncomfortable with all that joy of receiving once they become what we think is a bit 'too old' for acting that way. (Okay, maybe that was just me who did this with my own kids at times?!?)
So many women struggle with receiving. Receiving anything. Compliments, support, guidance, space for listening, touch, gifts - all of it.
For years I've been working on receiving a compliment without feeling the need to deflect it with an "oh, it's nothing, really" or "just a good hair day I guess" or some other energetic block that I put up so that the compliment doesn't really land on me. Or, I would immediately say, "you look beautiful too" or "I love your outfit too", feeling the need to compliment the giver back right away, which also never lets the compliment to me land. Or whenever someone would offer me help, I would either say, "no, it's okay, you're just as busy" or "sure but only if you let me help you in return".
As I've consciously worked on this for myself (and still work on it), I've realized that this is often rooted in a lack of self-worthiness and/or a wanting to be seen as a 'nice girl' and to be liked. It's been so fascinating to notice and name this about myself and now to be mindful and decide that when someone is giving me something, whether it's a compliment or a physical gift, to actually allow myself to receive it. To let the gift land and settle into me.
You likely know that giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin. They share the same energy. They are connected. We forget though that when we choose to not fully receive with joyfulness, and instead put up that energetic barrier, then the giver doesn't fully get to experience the beautiful energy of giving.
Picture yourself wrapping the perfect gift for someone, anticipating their joyful response, and then they don't accept your gift. They leave it sitting on the table or even give it back to you. Can you feel the immediate shift in your energy as the giver?
Try this little trick over the next week or two. Choose a color to represent the energy of giving and receiving. A color that you love. Maybe a bright pink or green or sparkly gold. Now throughout the holiday season, each time you are preparing or giving a compliment or support or a gift and also when someone is giving you something - whether it's a compliment or support or a physical gift - imagine that beautiful color moving between, within and around you both. If you notice yourself starting to block the gift, not allowing yourself to fully receive it, picture the color disappearing. It's just gone and replaced with a dreary dullness. Once you notice this, bring the color back by fully receiving it and joyfully letting it land. AND if you notice another woman blocking her own receiving of your gift, imagine her opening up to receive and being surrounded by the beautiful color you gave to the receiving energy.
Let both the giving AND the receiving flourish this holiday season.